Posts Tagged ‘depression’

Feeling Like a Waste of Space

{ 5 January, 2009 @ 8:56 pm } · { Confessions }
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Why won’t anyone give me a bloody break? I’ve been unemployed for a long time now and I’m feeling the effects. Stress, frustration, anger, moodyness, envious of what others have, complete loss of confidence, not wanting to socialize and generally withdrawing myself from everyone (not that there is many left).

Everything seems so pointless and these days anything I do is done half-heartedly or either not at all. I wanna beable to wake up and feel like there’s something to do, something to look forward to, make progress and achieve things like everyone else. Feel like such a waste of space and question what my worth is, even to the extent that I think about doing things that I never thought possible.

Is This London Life?

{ 9 November, 2008 @ 1:03 am } · { The Truth Booth }
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My life is boring and lonely. I’m depressed, I’ve put on weight, I have no friends, I hate my job where I work 58 hours a week although the payment is rubbish. There’s no possibility to get a normal boyfriend. I feel like I’m going down. Is it just me or is it London?

Come on, London is a great place you might just be working too many hours. Take a little time for you and do something energetic. This will be good for your physical and mental well-being.

Filling the Void With Crap

{ 11 July, 2008 @ 3:53 pm } · { Confessions }
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I think I have Excessive Compulsive Disorder. I’m always taking things to the extreme. It’s like I’m trying to fill a void. I bury myself in work. I consume enormous amounts of food, drinks, and fags. I buy loads of things I don’t need. I indulge in porn and masturbation. It makes me feel good for a little while, but then I get restless and feel like I need something again.

Life Sucks Innit

{ 6 July, 2008 @ 10:56 am } · { The Truth Booth }
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Sometimes I feel so alone in the world. The friends that you thought would be there weren’t. The family members you thought had your back didn’t. That one special person in your life who’s supposed to be right by your side doesn’t even exist. Life sucks innit?

In a strange way we are all alone, being conceived by the same parents isn’t the secret or the solution. Sometimes a stranger might hold the answer so don’t give up hope because Rome wasn’t built in a week. If life really sucked maybe all of us would walk around smiling…

I’m so Depressed

{ 26 June, 2008 @ 8:33 am } · { Confessions }
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I think I’ve been depressed most of my life though I never fully realised until last year. I’ve never had any treatment. I’m always the strong one. I take care of myself and I never give up so just keep going no matter what. But last year it hit me that nothing in my life is the way I pictured it would be. I am unemployed. I have no friends. I have no man. No children. I’m distant from my parents. My sister never calls. I cry every night.

I sleep absurd hours and am on the internet for hours just looking for something, anything, to keep my thoughts from wandering. I’m always tired. I feel weak. I’m so tired of living on pause. I’m tired of seeing other people with the things I want, doing the things I want to do. But I can’t seem to fix myself.